Joint survey by Dutch broadcaster KRO and Koninklijke Facultatieve

In relation to the question of how Dutch people deal with death, the KRO and Koninklijke Facultatieve collaborated in October to instigate a representative survey that was carried out by Kaski. The results of this survey, announced during the KRO’s Ode aan de doden (or Ode to the dead) on the 2nd of November, were striking. Four out of five Dutch people (82%) have not yet committed to paper their wishes regarding their own funeral. Two out of three (64%) have failed to discuss their own death and subsequent farewell with their loved ones. Two out of three (65%) rarely if ever visit the grave or memorial of deceased loved ones. Death from a distance It is also notable – and consistent with the above-mentioned results – that nearly half of all Dutch people do not want children to see the deceased. And more than 70% would rather not be placed on a bier at home. Death and the dead must be kept at an appropriate distance. Life after death Other survey results concern trends in attitudes to life after death. More than a third of Dutch people (36%) believe in life after death, reflecting a decline relative to two (2006) and twelve years ago (1996) when 40% and 45% respectively still believed in this notion. When asked what life after death involved, the survival of spirit/soul (21%) took precedence over heaven (16%). Religious Dutch people (Catholics 46% and Protestants 55%) tend to believe more in life after death than their non-religious compatriots (19%), and generally associate life after death with a heavenly existence. Talking to the dead Almost everyone questioned had lost a loved one. Over a quarter of Dutch people who had lost loved ones claim to feel their presence from time to time. Nearly half (45%) talk aloud or in their thoughts with the deceased. Women are more likely to feel the presence of loved ones and talk more frequently to them than men. One third consider that deceased loved ones can see us and know what we are up to. Once again women are more likely to agree with this. Commemoration Over 70% of Dutch people still regularly commemorate the dead. Birthdays (52%) feature most as a focus for remembrance. A comfortable majority of Dutch people (58%) keep a photo in memory of their loved ones. Altars in the home are rare (2%). Women are again more sensitive to this than men. Almost nobody uses the internet to commemorate the dead. Cremation or burial The Dutch have a slight preference for cremation (43%) over burial (39%). The answer to the question of who should lead the interviewee’s own funeral is particularly noteworthy. More Dutch people would opt for a good friend or family member (35%) than for a pastor, a minister or other clergyman (28%). Just 7% of those questioned would rather have a professional presiding over their funerary rites. Religious Dutch more sensitive Finally, it is striking that religious Dutch people treat death and the commemoration of the deceased more sensitively than non-religious people. Only 16% of churchgoers (Catholic 17%, Protestant 15%) state that they do not commemorate the dead at all. This figure is nearly double (30%) for the non-religious. Religious Dutch people also visit the graves of their deceased loved ones more often. Only around half of churchgoers (Catholics 48%, Protestants 55%) admit to never visiting, while nearly three quarters of non-churchgoers never attend the graves of their dead (73%). Download the entire survey report here (in Dutch).